Into a new Adventure

    The sun as it arose today seemed like the previous one had been replaced by a brighter and more unique version that blazed into view on the horizon. I know this is not true. It is the same Sun that has risen every other morning for as long as the world has spun. The change is in my perception of its glory.

    Today marks the beginning of a new journey, one that I am quite unsure about where it is going or what I will do when it arrives. I am comfortable in the notion that I have no idea where God is laying my path but will do my best to walk it. Almost everything I once believed has been removed from my current state of awareness and is being replaced by something new. 

Truth!

     Change is inevitable in life, and we must change as well. Still waters turn stagnant, and I am a rushing river, a force of nature reshaping the world to a purpose and plan given by Heaven. Not the world outside of myself but the one inside of me. God has a plan. 

   Confidence was never a trait I lacked. Communicating properly with people is. I am being taught better manners by the woman who makes me better just by being at my side. I am blessed. If she only knew how much of my confidence is putting on heirs for her benefit. 

     In my mind this is how I see it; she would probably say otherwise as I am quite sure she can see through any facade I might convey but only smiles to indicate she appreciates my effort.

  I smile back and my heart beats faster. I never had a chance. It’s a loss I have gladly welcomed and is the only one that has not bruised or scared my person. 

    Not everyone appreciates my insight. I am working on that and will have plenty of time to practice it on the voyage to our new destination and presumably the place we will call home. 

  God reveals his plans in stages as we are ready. I do my best to hear and obey as best I can. I do however make mistakes as I am only a man. Luckily for us God wants perfection, but he never expects it. We are all blessed creatures to have such a merciful Father who forgives our shortcomings and outright failures. I am scared to think where any of us would be without Divine intervention on our behalf. That is perhaps the only thing I am truly fearful of in this world.

Out to sea

    We arrived at the boarding dock at 7:00 a.m. and turned in our luggage. This will be my first trip on a steam liner, and I am looking forward to seeing how this marvel of engineering works. From a purely fascination perspective as I am no longer interested in the actual science behind such mechanisms and marvels, I have said farewell to those endeavors, but I am still intrigued by some concoctions that make advances in our human existence. 

    The steam engine has cut the time it takes to cross the Atlantic to a third of what it used to be and is getting shorter all the time. What a wondrous age we have been blessed to be part of. I cannot imagine a view of the world a hundred years from now. It would by my imagination be unlike anything we dare dream of today.

    I can picture a world where man is not confined to travel the horizon but will have access both above and below. There are rumors of flying aperitif being devised but I have not witnessed it myself and try not to give truth to things that could perhaps be slander.

    One day we as people might even travel the stars. What a triumph that would be. Breaking free of our Earthly starting point to travel through the Heavens. I doubt it will happen in my lifetime, but I can see a day when that dream is a reality and many other things, I can’t possibly imagine will be commonplace.

   For now, I am trying to stay focused on my immediate dreams: a new home and a new adventure. I will learn to FISH.

The voyage

    I myself have made the journey to the New World several times. I have been to most parts of the Great Globe of God’s Creation in my previous career as a naturalist but this is the first time I am traveling with my beloved wife and know I am not returning to England. I will not be going home when the task is accomplished. This time the task is to make this New World HOME and to build a life in it. This does in fact make it the greatest task set before me to date.

     I have the same awkward feeling in my mid-drift as I did when I first met Her. That turned into the best thing that had happened to me at the time. I hope the feeling will have the same result on this endeavor as it did the previous one. I pray often about it. I haven't told her yet but have started to feel the urge to do so creeping into my voice at certain times.

     Confidence, remember to be confident. “God does not give us a spirit of fear.” Once again the answers I seek are in the Good Book and not in the wisdom of men, I will tell her, soon.

    As the days went on and our voyage took us farther from what had been and closer to what was to be, the entire mood of the ship seemed to shift into a more pleasant atmosphere. I have not concluded yet if it is simply my observation of things that has changed or it is actually the world around us that has. What I have noticed is that I spend less time trying to actuate which it is and am simply grateful for the new attitude.

  My wife and I spent one grand afternoon watching whales that were crossing the Atlantic as well. In times past sailors followed them to find land. They have a migratory path from one feeding ground to another that leads close to land. At some point men mapped the world and compasses became our navigational tools. We moved away from the sun and stars and the things God created and started leaning more toward our own understanding of things. I think the old way was more eloquent if not more beautiful than the methods we have devised. They both serve the same purpose, but one is wondrous and the other is ordinary. I fail to see how that is advancement. I am no longer part of those convictions though.

    Science. HA!

    I am humbled by the grace and comfort I find in the world God created to be good and by the smile on her face. Point of note, she smiled while we watched the whales and when I told her how they were followed by early sailors, she did not seem interested at all by my explanation of a compass. Thank you, Jesus, for reminding us of what is Good in this world... It is so simple sometimes yet so elusive, and we are led astray so easily. Our enemy is a clever one indeed.

    It was while watching the whales that I had an epiphany. An idea sprang into my head that I cannot fully bring to understanding yet at the same time cannot leave behind.

    “All our actions, all the history of the mere mortal beings of this world are happening all around us. The things of note, the ones that people think have changed our world, are recorded and written down. They are taught to others so that they will remember. It is passed down from generation to generation as if it will shape the world to come. As a Christian I know this is not true. There will inevitably come a day when the only things written that will be of merit are the ones in the Bible. The Heavens and Earth WILL pass away.

 On that day how much of what is considered to be NOTEWORTHY will be of any significance?

    How much of what is already considered NOTEWORTHY is of any significance NOW?

    History is rewritten all the time. What humans consider knowledge, or wisdom, changes by popular opinion. It is all so very fleeting and from my new perspective, it is all very insignificant. 

written by Benjamin Evans

What would become of us if we cherished the smile on the innocent more than we cherished the means to control others? What secret armatures of delusion do those in control really have over most of the populace? I dare not want to have answers for such questions. I am eternally grateful that those endeavors are of no value to me. I was shown what is true, and good, and lasting, and important by a very small creature. 

A squirrel.

    The Good Lord works in mysterious ways. I must admit I wish some of the lessons were easier to learn but that was probably my own hubris in the way. I am just a man, and I am fallible. I am only made better by the Lord above and the Woman by my side. She is a force for good in her own ways. I am glad her ways differ from my own. Balance is key to success. I am not too proud to admit that my follies bring a smile to her face, even when I don’t fully understand what she is smiling at. I am simply enthralled to see her smiling at me. Thank you, Jesus.

    Instead of telling her what I think she has already presumed, I will let her read my journal of it. I write better than I speak most times. Something she has been fully aware of for quite some time. As have I.

Arival in a new land again

    Since I have never begun life anew, I did not know what would be needed in our new HOME.  As our belongings were being brought off the ship it seemed I had packed more than I would need and have probably not brought things I would need.

    The trunks of things I know I will have no use for keeping something off the ship and making quite a spectacle at the port. It is all to be loaded on a train and then we would venture to our new home. I started to notice a look I had not seen in a while from those who were loading our contents to the new mode of travel. It was the same look I obtained from those who were accompanying me when I first discovered the squirrel.

    I believe I will misdirect this conversation I can see about to bring itself to being and let my wife intervene. 

    I guessed right. She merely had to ask, and all was done without grumbling or any thought of wrongdoing. She has talents that for the life of me I cannot possess in any quantity by myself. I would have no doubt brought the conversation to fisticuffs if I had spoken to them. I lack social grace when speaking to others. She does not.

 BALANCE.

     Instead of writing like I speak it has been advised I learn to speak the way I write. I am quite aware my life and dealings with the others who populate the Globe would perhaps be less strained, in the time it takes me to respond to whatever situation I find myself in at the time, my voice acts of its own will. The intention is the same, but the eloquence is missing. I plan on working on this as well but cannot make any presumptions as to when I will succeed in it. Once again, I am lucky to have such a good woman to counteract my fallacies. I am glad she finds reason to smile so often when observing me, she is far better than I am, and I know this. I am looking forward to a life more involved with only her. The halls of academia were not my home, she is.

Time to learn fishing

      I must admit that I had most likely brought more books than I would need on the voyage or in my new HOME but there were things I needed to study for our new venture. Fishing being the main one. 

    I have studied it intently for a month now and though I have not made a single attempt at it, I am confident I will have great success. How hard can it be to out wit a fish?

    From what I can tell they are more mechanism than creature. They do not socialize. They do not congregate; they are simple instinct driven automata of the waters. 

They eat. They spawn. They die.

    All one needs to do to remove them from their aquatic dwelling is present an item that is either a food item to them or looks as if it could be one. All one needs to know is what such items are part of the culinary requirements for said fish and the game is won.

   It would appear that the need for any serious thought into this venture is not required during the game at all. A strategy is formed beforehand that is played out and results in success, at least for the fisherman. What could be easier?

    I must admit that I have a faint feeling that I am oversimplifying this quest. I try to dismiss it as just preliminary nervousness, but the feeling continues to find its way back into my consciousness.  I am intrigued by it. Perhaps it is some sort of preliminary warning of failure to come. Time will tell. Till then I will remain confident that I will achieve great success in FISHING.

  I am trying to remain open minded about the endeavor. I do not wish to inherit any hubris from previous endeavors into this one. As a man I am able to outwit myself at times. Without knowing everything about the gauntlet before me I can oversimplify the task into something I feel I am above or can achieve with great ease. Experience has taught me otherwise.

    Even though I cannot foresee the obstacle that may cause me to stumble does not mean there is not one. Our failures can hide in the smallest detail. They become a snowball rolling down a mountainside. It starts out small and harmless but by the time it has reached the valley it has collected enough mass and force to level buildings. Even though I cannot see how I could level a building with a fishing rod I can perhaps see how it could devastate my emotional well-being.

   If I thought, it was more challenging then I might not be so thwarted if I fail. There is a balance somewhere between how easy I perceive it to be and the confidence I need to overcome a difficult challenge that I do not have yet.

   I have heard from men on the boat that it is called fishing and not catching for a reason. They believe it has to do with a phenomenon called LUCK.

    I tried to point out that what they perceive as luck is simply when preparation meets opportunity. There is nothing supernatural about it but I have not fished yet. I do know that if there are any forces beyond my comprehension involved in fishing or any other task it is part of a divine plan and not some supernatural mysticism or something called LUCK.

   “There is no such thing as LUCK. “

   As expected, my explanation did little to sway them, and they all told me about the same thing upon my departure. “Good Luck.”

    I heard them laugh as I walked away. Ignorance is bliss, it has been said. I would love to know who said it and have a proper debate on the subject but I feel it would be another example of truth being in someone's eyes and yet they still refrain from seeing it. The saying would be more truthful if it had been “Ignorance is a choice.”

    Forgive my thoughts, Father, they still get away from me at certain times. All we can do is present the truth, it is up to them to receive it. Then we move on to the lives we are called to.

Keep it simple

    If it had not been for a small creature called a Squirrel, I would have taken up the challenge of enlightening the crew and most of the passengers to the truths they seem so blind to. It would most likely have ended in the same way as my attempt to dismay the populace that the Squirrel was in fact a monkey.

    Thankfully God’s plan led me to seeing clearly and understanding more about the ways in which people alleviate falsehoods. I am learning when to walk away before I must run. I am learning to write instead of speaking. I am learning that I have much to learn . . . . again.